Owning Conflict (Conflict Series 5 of 6)

Church leaders are called to strive for unity in the body of Christ. The apostle Paul writes to the Ephesian church, “I therefore a prisoner for the Lord urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called. With all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.” 

The apostle Peter also writes, “so I exert the elders among you as a fellow elder and a witness of the sufferings of Christ as well as a partaker in the glory that is going to be revealed shepherd the flock of God that is among you. Exercising oversight not under compulsion but willingly as God would have you not for shameful gain but eagerly. Not domineering over those in your charge but being examples to the flock.”

One of the most significant ways that church leaders can serve as examples to the flock is through their repentance. Pastor and author Jack Miller used to call church leaders to be the chief repenters in their churches modeling repentance and confession, especially before other church leaders. Only through the Gospel can we find the power to be criticized and then to humble ourselves and confess our sins to others no matter what their response might be to us.

It's been said that one of the most liberating acts in life is to confess your sin, not only to God but to another person. The Bible says, “confess your sins to one another and be healed.” I'm afraid many leaders have never been taught how to confess our sins. Again, Ken Sande in his excellent book, Peacemaker outlines a seven-fold description of genuine confession that I think you'll find helpful. 

The first mark of a genuine confession is to address everyone you have affected by your sin, not just one that you've hurt the most. Almost always our sin has affected more than one person. 

A second mark is to avoid half-hearted confessions that are often conditional. Never say, “if I offended you I am sorry” or “I'm sorry I said that, but you really upset me.” A genuine confession is normally marked by no defense of your offense.

Another mark of a genuine confession is that you admit your sin specifically. You don't say, “I know I have not been a good team member.” And saying instead something like, “I know I've had a very negative attitude that has hurt the team and hurt the church.” 

A fourth mark of a genuine confession is to apologize for hurting others in a way that demonstrates your sincere sorrow. Saying something like, “I'm truly sorry I failed to keep my commitment to you.” This is not a time for vague generalities but for very specific apologies.

A fifth mark is to state explicitly the consequences of your actions, showing that you aren't simply apologizing to be released from your responsibilities. You should be able to say things like, “it makes me very sad to think of how you must have felt and the pain you must have experienced as a result of what I said.” 

A sixth mark of a genuine confession is for you to explain very specifically how you plan to alter your behavior in the future. You should be able to say something like, “I've now begun to see someone to help me deal with the root of this problem so that I can be more likely not to hurt others as I have hurt you.”

Finally, do not force an admission of forgiveness from the person. Allow time for healing. Sometimes people who have been deeply wounded may not be able to forgive you at the time that you ask. Sometimes it can very selfish and unloving to ask the question,” Well, do you forgive me?” Instead your role in that situation is to ensure that person of your understanding and your willingness to do whatever it takes to restore your relationship no matter how much time it may take.

Overcoming Conflict (Conflict Series 6 of 6)

The final step in resolving all conflicts is to forgive those who sin against you and be reconciled to them. It's been said that to be reconciled means to replace hostility and separation with peace and friendship. The personal offenses that separate you from another person must be laid to rest through your confession and your forgiveness. 

Forgiveness is not merely a feeling. It is primarily a decision, an act of the will, that God calls you to make, often in spite of your feelings. Forgiveness is always costly, just like it cost God something great, in his Son, to forgive you. It will always cost you something great to forgive someone else. The person who has wronged you is in your debt until you decide to release that debt you've been holding on to. Forgiveness is a costly choice for you, but a choice that always pays the giver rich dividends.

What is this decision we are to make when we forgive someone? To forgive someone means you will no longer dwell on the incident. When it comes to your mind, you will intentionally, purposefully work so as not to allow yourself to dwell on it. Secondly, to forgive means that you will not bring up this incident again and use it against the person. It also means you will not talk to others about it. Thirdly, to forgive someone means that you will not allow this incident to hinder your personal relationship with this person.

Now, some of you were thinking, "I'm so hurt, how can I ever do that?" Well, I've got good news. There is great hope. God promises to give you all the power you need to forgive, a power beyond yourself, through repentance and faith in Jesus Christ. The Bible says Jesus was tempted in all things, yet without sin. That means he was tempted not to forgive you for all the sins you have committed against him, not to pay the price that was required for your forgiveness, but with great suffering, he resisted that temptation and willingly allowed all of God's punishment for your sin to be placed on him so that all of his righteousness could be counted to you.

Also, that when you face the same temptation he once faced, the temptation not to forgive someone who sinned against you, you would find in his forgiveness of you the power to forgive those who have sinned against you. Your ability to forgive is directly related to your understanding of God's love for you in Christ, and your understanding of God's love for you in Christ is directly related to your understanding of how big a sinner you really are. He who is forgiven little, loves little, but he who is forgiven much, loves much.

If your understanding of the gospel is that you have only been forgiven a little, then you will only be able to forgive a little, but when your understanding of the gospel begins to grow so that you start seeing that you have been forgiven much, then and only then, will you be supernaturally empowered to forgive much, but if you try to forgive others solely on your own, you will never be able to do it. If you will begin repenting of your sin, drawing near to your savior in faith-filled worship, and then dare to step out and act in obedience, I promise you, on the authority of God's word, that he will give you a supernatural power to forgive anyone for anything.

Planter and Sending Models (Models Series 1 of 5)

In this article we begin the transition from the more conceptual realm of things like Vision, Mission, Philosophy and Purpose, Values and Styles to the more practical realm of developing church planting Models.

We're using the word Models to describe ministry approaches and strategies. In this lesson we are answering the question, "What will be our ministry approaches and strategies to church planting and renewal?" In this article we're exploring four types of models: planter models, sending models, parenting models and ministry models.

Let's look first at planter models. There are two questions that every church planter should deliberately seek to answer. One, do I plan to leave or stay after my church is planted or established? Two, do I plan to be solo or have a paid leadership team at the beginning? In 1 Corinthians 3:6 Paul writes, "I planted, Apollos watered, but God caused the growth." Paul clearly understood that church planting is God's work, but he also recognized how God chose to use him and Apollos in different ways in planting and growing the church at Corinth.

Now, some church planters are called and gifted to be starters, others are called and gifted to be builders. Church planters who only stay with the church they've planted until the church is established or indigenous have the advantage of planting other churches in their lifetime and broadening the impact of their ministry that way. The church planters who stay with the church they've planted long-term, sometimes even decades, normally have the advantage of having a deeper long-term impact on their immediate community.

Neither type of church planter is necessarily better than the other. They're just different sets of gifts and callings. We call the starter the catalytic planter and the builder the founding planter. One of the decisions you need to make at this stage is how you are answering the question do you plan to leave or stay after your church is planted or established. Are you going to be a catalytic planter, planning to leave once the church is established, or a founding planter, planning to stay with the church long-term?

The next category of planter model is determining whether you are going to be solo or team. Another important question worthy of exploration is whether you think you may have the gifts, calling and resources to plant a church on your own as a solo planter, or if you think your gifts, calling and resources are such that you should only plant a church in close partnership with other paid leaders, a team planter. The financial model for both the solo and team planter can range all the way from part-time, bi-vocational tentmaker to full time with full financial support. The same is true of members of the team accompanying the team church planter.

Building on the determination of your planter model and taking the next steps for how that model will be implemented practically requires you to determine your anticipated sending model. Church planters normally use one of four sending models by which they are sent out to plant a new church. The solo model is where the planter is sent out alone, and no core group exists in the ministry focus area.

The team model is where the planter is sent out with a leadership team, and again there is normally no core group in the ministry focus area.

The core model is where the planter is sent out with a core group, or to a core group already existing in the ministry focus area.

Then there are hybrid models that combine team and core where the planter is sent out with a leadership team and a core group, or with a leadership team to a core group already existing in the ministry focus area.

Even if you have the gifts, calling and resources to begin the church planting process alone, in other words before you develop a core group and a leadership team, you will eventually need a leadership team and a core group of families who are committed to help you plant this new church. The key question is when do you need to have a core group and a leadership team. Of course the answer is always as soon as possible.

Church Parenting Models (Models Series 2 of 5)

In this article, we now shift our focus from the planter models and the sending models to the parenting models. Here we examine common ways that the established or sponsored churches can help plant or parent new churches. Similar to the church planter model options of being a solo planter or team planter, in the same way, the parenting models can either be solo parenting or team parenting.

Solo parenting is when a single church plants a church. Team parenting is when more than one church partner to start a church. Just like in church planter team planting, the team approach is normally the most effective for most churches. The solo parenting model is normally limited to larger churches. They make up less than 10% of a global church.

Once you have decided if you're going to use the solo or team parenting model, then you normally choose between four basic models of parenting a new church from an existing church. The first model is called the branching model. Here the church is planting a church in their same area or city, neighborhood or region. The new church may even target the same ministry focus group as a sponsoring church, or a dissimilar ministry focus group.

The next model is called the colonizing model. This is planting a church in another area outside of the parenting church, outside of their city, neighborhood or region. The new church may focus on the same ministry focus group as a sponsoring church or a dissimilar ministry focus group. A distinguishing mark here is that ministry focus group is in another area.

A third parenting model is called the satellite or multi-site model. This is when one church plants new ministry congregations but does not view those new congregations as separate churches, but as satellite or sites of the same church. The new sites may focus on the same ministry focus group as the sponsoring church, or dissimilar ministry focus group.

A fourth parenting model is called the segregation model. This involves planting a church within the church, often using the same church facilities but at different times. The purpose is normally to serve a dissimilar ministry focus group. An example would be a Hispanic church starting an Anglo church within the church using the same church facilities so they might serve that part of their community that their Hispanic church is not being effective reaching.

Oftentimes church planters are being sent out not from a church or a group of churches, but from a sending agency or organization. In such cases, it is still very important for church planters to understand which parenting model they will be adopting in their ministry focus group; to plant grow and multiply gospel centered churches.

Ministry Model Components (Models Series 3 of 5)

So far in this module we've taken a look at planter models, sending models, and parenting models. For the remaining part of this lesson our focus is on ministry models. In developing your ministry model, you're beginning to answer the question, how will my church ministries work together?

Now it's often helpful to start at the end and work backwards or to begin with the end in mind. Envision a picture in your mind of what you would like your church to look like in two years. Be both visionary and realistic here. This is not meant to be a picture of your dream church or what you would like the church to look like if everything goes perfectly. It's also not meant to be a picture of what you envision your church will look like in five or 10 years. Instead, picture in your mind the time when your church has just reached the maturity level of having the essential gospel ministries in place to be considered a healthy young church.

The ministries may not be very well developed, but they are at least there in seminal form and developing toward further stability and maturity. With this realistic vision in mind, in this article, you are going to create a ministry model flowchart. It will be most helpful if you do this with a document or on a sheet of paper to visualize the dynamics at work showing how you are planning to have your major ministries relate to each other.

A ministry flowchart is a diagram of all your churches future major ministries, showing how the key components relate to one another in the process of helping people grow towards spiritual maturity. A ministry flowchart depicts the logical ministry sequence by which people move from being unbelievers to being fully mature church leaders.

Now this is not a strategic planning chart to help you understand how you will get from where you are today to where your church needs to be in two years. We'll do this later. Instead, this is meant to be a snapshot of what you would like the church to look like after your initial few years of church planting ministry.

Before you begin this exercise, it's important to know that there are many different ways to create a flowchart like this. There's no infallible example to follow and often how the various aspects of a church fit together will depend on your unique cultural or stylistic factors that we have already studied. As you do this you are meant to be drawing from all the work you've done previously, especially with your mission and purpose statements. Based on the style's articles that you have completed, let's look at two examples of a ministry models flowchart.

The first is a flowchart for an attractional model. The focus is on drawing people in through what we called earlier, the front door of the church. This ministry model is meant to show a sequence of ministry development moving from the left to the right. You're meant to see here a sequence of ministries beginning with outreach ministries on the left side moving all the way through to leadership development ministries on the right side. Here you are meant to see a logical ministry sequence through which people are brought from being unbelievers to being fully devoted followers of Christ and leaders in a local church. Notice on the left side of this flowchart the outreach ministries.

Those are meant to channel people into attraction events and then worship in celebration, from which people are directed to a newcomer's class or other events seeking to lead them eventually into a small group and then involvement in some form of ministry and leadership development. If you look closely you'll see how all the biblical purposes are displayed in these components. The purposes of worship, discipleship, fellowship, and outreach. They're all here and they have all been designed to relate effectively to one another representing an intentional discipleship pathway leading someone from being an uninterested unbeliever to being a fully devoted follower of Christ and leader in the church.

Next, let's look at a second example. This one is a flowchart that is an example of a scattering model or what we called earlier the side door model. In this model, rather than seeing ministry sequence in a linear fashion from the left to the right, this model shows ministry sequence from above to below. Notice how in this model, corporate worship is very set apart from outreach. Rather than focusing primarily on attraction events and worship and celebration for outreach, the focus in this model is more on the mobilization of ministry teams doing outreach ministries through cell groups. Just as we saw in our study of ministry styles earlier, your ministry model flowchart will always have both dynamics of front door and side door represented. It's just normally helpful for you to know which of these dynamics is most effective in your unique cultural context.

Now you're ready to begin the exercise. In the next article, I'll begin to walk you through in great detail, step-by-step, the process that you can take to begin developing your first draft ministry model.

Ministry Model Development (Models Series 4 of 5)

In this article I am orienting you and preparing you to do your ministry model exercise. For many years I've done this exercise with church leaders around the world, and watched many of them gain great clarity about how to bring this concept of God's purposes for their community down to practical ministry. In those settings I usually ask leaders to gather a few materials. I recommend putting this exercise down on paper or in a document, and not just thinking through it. This will benefit you by making it more clear, and helping you to see how the various ministry components you're developing in the church can and should fit together. You will complete this exercise following this session in five steps. You will have access, in writing, to everything I am saying here after you complete this session, so just relax now and become oriented to the five steps you'll take following this article.

In the first step you will list each anticipated major ministry you will be developing in the church. I recommend aiming for eight to ten major ministries. Do not list more than 12, if you can, you will always be able to list more later. Before you do this, go back and read over your Mission statement you completed earlier. Review your answers to the questions “who are you called to serve?” that you did in your people profile. “What are their greatest needs? How will your church help meet those needs?”

Also be sure to go back and review your biblical Purposes statement you created earlier. Make sure that all the biblical purposes are reflected in the major ministries that you list here. This means you must be certain to list among your major ministry components, the ministries of worship, discipleship, fellowship, evangelism, acts of mercy, and leadership development. This also a very good time to review your Values statement, and be sure to include specialized ministries that uniquely reflect your values, like men's and women's ministries, ministry to singles or the elderly, to youth or to widows, or to orphans.

Once you have listed these ministries, your second step is to organize them together. Your task is to arrange those ministries now in a logical order, in ministry sequence. Select the sequence option that works best for you. Whether that be from the right to the left, from the left to the right, top to bottom, or bottom to top. As you do this, reflect your gathering or scattering outreach dial by determining your entry points into the church for people. Consider now practical ways that your ministry will fit in relation to taking someone from the beginning contact with the church to advanced commitments. In other words, as I shared earlier, organize the ministries in such a way that you can trace how a person can go from a new Christian to ministry involvement, to becoming a [mature leader through your church's ministry model.

After you have listed these ministries in a logical order and sequence, your third step is to draw lines between the ministry components to show your intentional discipleship pathways. As you draw these lines, begin to crystallize in your mind the discipleship pathways you envision for the spiritual growth of people, and the communication pathways between ministries and leaders. After you've completed drawing lines between the ministry components to show the pathways, your fourth step is to write names or titles next to the ministry components to show the leaders of each component. If you're already on the field, when choosing names and titles, be sure to identify present leaders responsible for some of these ministry components and then develop all the titles needed for future leaders of each of these components. Examples of titles you could put under these components would be something as simple as worship leader, small groups leader, or outreach leader.

Finally, step five is to review the ministry model you have created and determine the answers to each of these very important following questions.

Where in this ministry model are people most likely to be converted by coming to saving faith in Christ?

Where in your ministry model are people most likely to be discipled and nurtured, that they might grow to spiritual maturity in Christ?

Where in your ministry model will people have significant opportunity to be equipped to serve, using their gifts in and through the body of Christ?

Where in your ministry model are true leaders being developed in a holistic way?

Lastly, be sure to identify where in your ministry model is your church invested outside of itself to bless and to serve the community in which God is placing you.